MORE THAN MY INSECURITIES

CHAPTER TEN

Amara barely slept that night.

The moment replayed in her mind over and over again. The silence. The way he looked at her. The sudden closeness. The kiss. It had happened so quickly that she didn’t even understand it until it was over.

She kept asking herself the same question.

Why?

By morning, her chest felt heavy. She didn’t know how to face him again. She didn’t even know what they were now. Teacher and student? Friends? Something else?

When she entered the lecture hall later that day, her eyes searched the front unconsciously. Her heart skipped when she saw him already standing there, arranging his notes.

Dr. Adrian Okafor.

She quickly looked away and moved to the back, hoping he wouldn’t notice. She wanted to disappear into the crowd. To pretend nothing had happened.

But he noticed.

He paused mid-sentence as he began the lecture. His eyes scanned the class, then settled on her.

"You," he said calmly. “Why are you sitting there?”

The class turned.

Amara felt heat rush to her face.

“Come to the front.”

Her hands tightened around her notebook. Slowly, she stood up and walked forward. Every step felt heavier than the last. She could feel students watching her, whispering quietly.

When she sat down, she kept her eyes on her book.

She could feel his presence. Close. Too close.

Throughout the lecture, she barely heard anything he said. Her thoughts were louder. Her heartbeat louder. Once, she accidentally looked up and found him already looking at her.

He didn’t look away immediately.

Amara quickly dropped her gaze.

After the lecture, students began to leave. She packed her books quickly, hoping to escape before he spoke to her. But his voice stopped her.

“Amara.”

She froze.

It was the first time he had called her name in front of others.

Her hands trembled slightly as she turned.

“Yes, sir.”

“Wait.”

The classroom slowly emptied. The noise faded. Soon, only the two of them remained.

The silence felt different now.

Uncomfortable.

Heavy.

She didn’t know where to look.

Dr. Adrian Okafor walked slowly toward her. His expression was calm, but his eyes were searching her face.

"You avoided me," he said quietly.

Amara swallowed. “No… sir.”

He studied her for a moment, as if trying to read her thoughts.

“You didn’t message me.”

She didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t even known she was expected to.

"I… I didn’t know if I should," she replied softly.

Another silence followed.

Then he sighed slightly.

“You're overthinking it.”

Amara’s heart tightened. Overthinking? Wasn’t she supposed to think about it?

He leaned slightly against the desk, still watching her.

"You’re scared," he added.

She didn’t respond, but her silence answered him.

For a moment, his expression softened.

"You don’t have to be," he said.

Amara wasn’t sure that was true.

Students’ voices echoed faintly from outside the hallway. The world continued normally, but inside the classroom, everything felt suspended.

Dr. Adrian Okafor straightened up.

"We'll talk later," he said.

Her stomach dropped slightly. Talk about what?

She nodded quietly and left the classroom, her mind spinning.

As she walked down the corridor, she could already feel eyes on her. Two girls whispered and glanced in her direction. A boy nudged his friend. Someone chuckled softly.

A familiar fear crept back in.

Had someone noticed something?

Or was she just imagining it?

Later that evening, her phone buzzed.

An unknown number.

Her heart skipped.

She hesitated before opening the message.

“Did you get home safely?”

She stared at the screen.

She didn’t need to ask who it was.

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, unsure.

After a long moment, she typed a short reply.